Re-Branding the Baby Yankees for One Year - Not Cool

I just read this article, which, if you are too lazy to click on the link, basically says that the AAA baseball team normally known as the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Yankees (to distinguish them from the major league team the New York Yankees) will be re-branded the 'Empire State Yankees' for only one year while their stadium in Pennsylvania is being rebuilt. Apparently this makes sense to someone with dollar signs in their eyes ('Just think, Pinky, we'll force them to buy all new hats and tee-shirts that we'll call 'limited edition'!), but I think it is the worst idea ever. During the one year that this team will be playing its 'home' games in other stadiums, traveling much more than usual, and getting a lot of media attention in those other towns, the team will reach thousands of new fans, create headlines in local sports sections, and...totally confuse everyone with a misleading, temporary new name, image, and logo??? Where did their marketing consultants get their degrees, clown college?

This traveling team situation, while inconvenient for the players and the fans alike, is the perfect opportunity to raise brand awareness and fan potential by increasing the time the Yanks are on the road as mobile ambassadors for themselves and for this area. The fact that the baby Yankees are even IN Lackawanna County is still new to many fans, since it wasn't that long ago that we hosted the Red Barons for Philadelphia. Scranton had the Phillies' AAA team for what, twenty years? And now that we've 'upgraded' to host theYankees, the team is encouraging them to tour under a name that totally removes any traces of NEPA from their logo? S-M-R-T!

The explanation that this temporary name change "will allow [the cities in New York] to more closely identify with the team during its temporary stay" is so ludicrous and nonsensical it barely bears repeating. First of all, people in New York already identify with the major league Yankees. That's not going to change because of anything the minor league team does, and most people will see 'Yankees' and identify the two no matter what the first part of the name is. Secondly, why doesn't the U.S. Army change its name to the Afghanistan Liberation Army when in Afghanistan and the English Ally Army when in England? Oh, of course, because changing their location does not change the make-up of the army, its mission, goals, loyalty, or home base. This might not be the best example but the American military is the American military no matter where its people go. Apparently, the same cannot be said when playing more away games than usual for a baseball team.

Honestly, I don't really care that much about sports, but this decision is such a dumb marketing and PR move that it makes me think the real reason the team is being 'temporarily' re-branded is that they have no intention of coming back to Pennsylvania at all. The situation is complex, but there have been problems with the stadium, problems with funding, and problems with local officials and their wheeling and dealing behind the scenes. Locals will understand when I say that ever since the Yanks came to this area, the feeling has been that their parent company thinks they are too good to play Scranton, and this move leaves a bad taste in my mouth about the whole team.

If the taxpayers are investing their money into this sports team for upgrades and renovations, then we shouldn't get the shaft when they go out into the world. This team is not separate or better than Lackawanna County - they are, at least for the time being, the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Yankees, and that is how they should be known for this one year of away games. This is the KEYSTONE State, not the Empire State, and if they want to be known as the Empire State Yankees, then maybe they should stay in New York. It seems to me very likely that they will do so.  I'm not trying to bring more problems to this area, but reading between the lines makes this seem like a gradual way out of their association with this area. If we pour millions of dollars into renovating to their specifications and end up with no team to generate ROI for that money, it will be one more disaster that this area really can't afford to shoulder.

Also, this might be unclear writing in the original article, but it makes it seem like the Rochester Red Wings not only pushed for this decision but will reap the profits from the merchandising. Great!

UPDATE: The story gets even weirder: The Stadium Authority Board, which OWNS the franchise, apparently had no idea that they were going to change the name. Um...then who is this 'they' that is changing the name?? I think the SAB should put a stop to this immediately, but board president James Timlin said tonight on the news that the board "doesn't have a problem with it." Well, they should - nothing should be done without their approval, why aren't they making a point that they're in charge and nixing this whole plan?

Also, after reading to this article,  I think I'm right about the end of the SWB Yankees, as much as I hoped it wasn't true. " 'Right now we're in negotiations with the New York Yankees and Mandalay on whether or not we're going to have baseball in the future of Lackawanna County," said Commissioner Jim Wansacz. He added negotiations are going well, but the news of the name change came as a surprise to the county." I'm pretty sure that if the first half of that last sentence is true and things were going well, the owners of team would not be blindsided by such a ridiculous slap in the face as this name change.

Lowline NYC

This awesome project on Kickstarter is already fully funded but still accepting donations to expand the prototype phase. While I disagree that there is 'limited green space' in NYC (there is a pocket park like every 10 blocks, especially in the Village/LES), there is definitely limited SPACE in NYC, period, and this is so much more appealing to me than throwing a few trees on the roof of a building no one is allowed to explore anyway and calling it 'green.'

This idea, to not only renovate and utilize an old trolley station for public recreation but also to magically (ok, it is actually new technology but it sounds like magic to me) use fiber optic cables to inundate the space with real, underground rays of sunshine, has really sparked my interest. And also, it will be super-helpful, if not life-saving, after the Electrical/Zombie/Mayan/Republican Apocalypse. (One of those things will end us, to be sure.)

 Someday, remote skylights will be used for so many awesome things that the fact that they were invented because an architect wanted to play in an abandoned arm of Fraggle Rock will be like if the guy that invented shoes only invented shoes so he could reach the spear he kept on his top shelf without pulling out a step stool every time.



One thing that I had to know was WHY, OH WHY would they go to all of the trouble of excavating, building, decorating and later upgrading this large underground space and then close it off and abandon it exactly 40 years later? Apparently, when the trolley service across the Williamsburg Bridge was discontinued, they simply converted the trolley lanes on the bridge to car lanes and, presumably to prevent tourists, or worse, hipsters, from driving down the ramp to the supposedly awesome underground area (you know those hipsters would have turned it into an ironic barbershop-slash-mustache atelier or a bar that served nothing but tap water shots and expired cans of Tab),they blocked off the whole thing.

Dear 1948: You are wasteful, and apparently learned nothing from the motto of the Great Depression (Reduce, Reuse, Recycle, duh). Also, you have greatly increased the length of time until it won't matter that I always forget to buy light bulbs by delaying the technology that will replace light bulbs by however many years it takes to finish this project. OR, has your sloth and lack of creativity actually fostered the development of this technology 64 years later? My mind is blown! In closing, 1948, say hi to my grandparents and have a nice sloe gin fizz for me!

Colors, Vegetables, Rain

Broccoli reminds me of nothing

I was chopping peppers for a salad this afternoon and something about the colors – the pale green, thick orange and bright yellow reminded of the feel of a day, years ago. Eating a burrito. At first, I thought this memory was in Philadelphia, but the more I think about walking around and the way the streets were laid out, I think it was actually Harrisburg. How could chopping colored capsicum remind me of burritos, you ask. I think it was the stark shiny colors, the way the crisp peppers settled next to the wet beauty of a sliced cucumber and an opaque artichoke heart. It reminded me of the bright strand of triangular plastic flags emphatically pointing down to the long row of fillings options, box after box of multi-colored beans, salsas, meats, onions, cheeses. The unusual and least popular options in smaller bowls near the end of the counter; shriveled bacon, raw peppers, tiny spicy tamales, sliced pickles, cucumbers, neon yellow mashed corn salsa.

                The more I thought about it, the more that day shook itself out from the folds of my shaky memory. I was with an intriguing friend and the intriguing friend of my friend. We sat outside under the watchful protection of another thick rainbow of snapping plastic flags and tried to outdo each other in sheer will-based food consumption. Our burritos must have been five pounds apiece. At that time in our lives, we all valued quantity and cheapness of the food over quality and healthiness, and those hefty Mexican food bullets delivered on both counts. Despite our best efforts at unnecessary gluttony, I’m pretty sure we all carried little lumps of tinfoiled leftovers through the streets that day.

Actual size

                Earlier that day, relaxing at the friend-of-a-friend’s house. It was beautiful and impeccable, an old farmhouse built on a scale so foreign to me that I’ll never forget my dim-witted revelation, made after ducking through every low doorway in the place; these friendly, tiny people bought this two hundred year old home because, not in spite of, the scale of the building. The low ceilings were complimented by the short chairs. The mirror, set close over the small bathroom sink, was tilted down because it was aimed toward their comfort zone. I practically had to kneel to check my face in that mirror, and I thought about the height of my kitchen cabinets, the storage space above my closet that I reach into without using a step stool. This (belated) train of thought lent a Lilliputian feel to the day, and later, as I traveled down the streets behind my friends, I looked at the spaces above their heads, feeling enormous, but not really in a self-conscious way.

                I thought about that beautiful house once later on while watching a show about actual little people and noticing the way they had modified their house to suit their needs. Tiny kitchen counters squatted so close to the floor that a person of normal height would have to sit on the ground to prepare a meal. My first thought, as a tall person, was how very inconvenient those modifications must be to their regular-sized children. Then I thought about the house in Harrisburg and realized how inconvenient everything else must be for the little people.

My actual size, and also why I stopped wearing white

                Following along the strange paths of the never-ending rabbit hole of associative memory, I thought about the other times I had spent time with these friends together. I remembered exploring Washington, D.C. in the rain, curiously examining the construction of a sideways-folding futon in her dorm room, meeting many old friends and many new friends-of-friends. Once, we ate at a Japanese restaurant with a motley crew of close friends and new associates, and the colors of a seaweed salad exploded out of the mist that covered the entire rainy day to entertain our table with its brilliant greens, blues, purples and reds. We walked what felt like miles through a raging thunderstorm to seek out an ice cream shop that ‘would change our lives.’ The purveyors of magical treats turned out to be closed by the time we swam that far down the street. I remember running across intersections, battling my broken umbrella, laughing and complaining at the same time. That jaunt ruined my favorite-ever pair of sneakers, non-sporty black Nine Wests that reminded me of sleek supermodels sprinting down New York avenues in couture dresses and sloppy sweatshirts, late for their call times during Fashion Week. I felt small complaining about the loss of the shoes, like a bad sport who would chintz out on an adventure, but I said it anyway. It is rare that I actually care about a piece of clothing, but I do feel like I’ve learned my lesson now. Run through knee-high storm-soaked streets, Elizabeth. The shoes would have worn out before this memory has, no matter what. 

My short friend's shoes were fine.

                We went into a bookstore and everyone picked up a different book. We opened to a random page and each read a line, going in a circle, trying to piece together a story from the lines we had been assigned by chance. Everyone laughed. Years later I bought the book I read from at a library sale. It was horrible. I was jolted by a pleasant recognition whenever I came across one of the lines I used, though. I could pick them out, uselessly, but I can’t remember the lines I write in my head at night without groping for a pencil.

                Later that night, just the three of us again, loping across the college parking lot with one inefficient umbrella, almost immune to the poor weather by then. My clothes were plastered to my skin like a wetsuit, and even when we got inside, my hair dripped down my glasses as if my body had internalized the rhythm of the rain. In the lobby of her dorm we shook ourselves like dogs and I caught a look that passed between them. I wondered if they were together, and if so, why I wasn’t supposed to know. When I starting paying attention, I knew they were together and felt silly for not noticing earlier. I wasn’t jealous, just annoyed at the sizable shift in dynamics so late in the game. That’s not what I remember most about that day, though. The seaweed salad floats in my mind’s eye, captured forever like a bright spiky painting, and the water licks at my calves, the dark gullies eddying around my steps, soaking my pants, ruining my shoes, stalling nearby cars, denying me ice cream.

Goals

Via my friend Dazza

I just wrote this as a visceral response to Watching Your Brother Die on 300 Reviews. It's a different situation but it's the same in the end. I reread the following once for punctuation and I doubt I could get through it again. Sometimes, a writer can say things to the void that they can't talk about with themselves.

Sad truths

This Hospital

Standing next to the hospital bed, holding the strongest hand you’ve ever touched in your life, the hand that has picked you up when you fell and ruffled your hair and fed you secret popcorn treats in the middle of the night, you don’t want to think of letting go. The hand goes cold and your mind goes blank.

In the future, you will have major surgery in this hospital and secretly resign yourself to dying in a room nearby. In the future, you will work in this hospital and wonder if working in this hospital is an adequate connection to the ghost that never appears even though you often call to him. In the future, your mother will have major surgery in this hospital and you will consume petty distractions as your sustenance in order to avoid remembering this moment. You can’t know any of this. Somehow, you know all of this.

In the past, you’ve rushed to this hospital for or with your grandmother, your mother, your aunts, your cousins. Your father. You’ve rushed here, white clenched digits on the steering wheel, various pale passengers in the seat beside you. In the past, you’ve known you were in a competition with the invisible racing greyhound of time and you’ve always won. You’ve seen smiles in the ER, or admissions that last a single night, or long-term care that ends with your father dancing in this hospital in an open-backed gown, itching to go home. Now, there is no competition with time. Now, there is no dance.

You let go of the hand that you love and run down the hallway to throw up. It won’t be the last time you throw up in this hospital, but it will be the last time you hold that hand.

New Year's Resolutions

 Photo by SpaPax

I know it is only the sixth of December, but I want to ring a bell for New Year's Resolutions RIGHT NOW! This is something that needs careful attention, planning, and self-examination, and I am certainly not going to wait until December 31st confronts me with its sparkling lights and champagne glasses to reflect on the direction I want to set for myself!*

I have a firm and long-held belief that New Year's Resolutions should NOT be boring, draining, or even necessary pledges. The reason most people don't hold fast to their self-imposed vows is because they pick something they think they should resolve to do, be, or accomplish, and not a change or habit that they want or even crave in their new lives in the next year. Eventually, most people start a petulant, teenage resentment circle in their heads and either get annoyed with their own imperatives (I'll go to the gym more or learn to pick up my dirty socks when I FEEL like it, okay MOM?) or just give up (It's too big of a goal to accomplish, anyway, so I'm not even going to keep working on this stupid book!). When New Year's Resolutions are formed as leashes used to hold yourself to a goal or idea that really isn't coming from your heart, they can't and won't be sustained throughout the year or result in any measurable life improvements.

Photo by koinus

This is why I must take this opportunity to heartily encourage all of you to pick something FUN, UNUSUAL or BRAVE for your NYR this year, and humbly request suggestions for my own resolution. I usually pick pretty unusual goals for myself, and I'm having trouble pinpointing what I want to do in 2011 to help define myself, for myself. Because really, we all need to focus on our own journeys and help to satisfy our own self-image first, before we focus on how we present ourselves to others. Amen!

Here are some past examples of my own old resolutions to help inspire you:

 2006: Read 100+ Books

 Photo by FilmDave

In retrospect, I consider this to be 'starting small' regarding interesting resolutions. It's not that far off from a normal vow, despite being very ambitious. However, I read extremely fast and easily outpaced this goal. It was the beginning of a good habit for me, though, wherein I now keep a list of all the books I read each year. Reviewing it is helpful to my poor memory, especially since I give away, donate or sell almost all of the books I read in order to maintain walking space in my house. Also, I can now vaguely track my spare time (how OCD of me) by checking the total number of books against other things, like the volume of my writing projects and the amount of crochet I've completed. Okay, this sounds totally psycho, but sometimes it is good to know exactly how you spend your life!

If you read a lot, I highly recommend keeping a list for yourself. It sounds simple, but it is a powerful organizational and memory tool.

 2007: Throw A Drink in Someone's Face

Photo by Not Jane Doe

Here's where it started to get interesting. This sounds totally rude AND IT IS, which is why I wanted to do it. Everyone has had those moments when other people have said or done things that were completely out of line, and very often we are too timid and proper to give someone a well-deserved smack. I had a lot of those moments in 2005 and 2006, and I just took what those assholes were dishing out without really responding in a way that let them know they were acting or speaking unacceptably.

I decided that I needed to learn to stand up for myself in both business and social situations and not allow others to have the power to talk down to me or to purposely take advantage of me. This resolution was about empowerment, finding my own voice, and clearly defining myself as someone who would rather make waves than sit back and let myself be treated poorly. I realized that I would stand up for other people more often than I stood up for myself. I'd fight like a tiger for friends and family who had been wronged, but just give up on issues that had to do with my own life. With this resolution, I gave myself permission to do something that might get me in 'trouble,' and having that wildcard in my back pocket helped me be more assertive and self-possessed for the entire year.

 2008: Teach Myself to Raise One Eyebrow at a Time

Photo of Mark

One of my high school friends has incredible eyebrow powers, and he would sort of taunt me with his prowess because I did not have the capability to do the wry 'immobile face/singular eyebrow raise' thing. It was quite annoying to have to, you know, use words to express my emotions when he could counter with a much more expressive look.

When I found out that he had actually taught himself to do this from scratch, I was amazed. Quizzing him obsessively about his technique and time line helped me to figure out that he developed this mastery by combining sheer force of will with a simple understanding of how the muscles in the face work.  After a few minutes of  instruction, I had a new goal in life. 

Why would I want to focus on something this inane for an entire year? Because I knew it was possible! I'm never going to resolve to go to the gym and get really muscled, because that just doesn't fit with my personality. But focusing on developing my one wry eyebrow to help my face become more expressive - now that, I can get behind!

2009: Green Eyes, All the time 

Photo by Ruth Flickr

This builds from the previous year, in which I had moderate (some might say, amazing) success at retraining my body to do what I wanted, despite the dubiousness of my friends and family that my goal was even possible. I have hazel eyes, and for my next trick I wanted to see if by learning to focus I could enhance the green. (No, colored contacts were too easy to employ.)

Here are some questions to consider: What do you want to do with your body? Do you want to leave it alone, natural, in the original packaging, like a collector's toy that sits on a shelf? Do you want to rip it apart and put it back together in a new way by changing your hair color, your eye color, your muscle structure? Do you want to totally renovate your physicality by adding tattoos, piercings, permanent makeup? Do you want to invest in plastic surgery? Do you even care how you present yourself to the outside world?

In 2008 I started to think about these things for the first time in my life. Up until then, I just accepted what was given to me. If I gained weight, then I gained weight. If my freckles bothered me, I just didn't look in the mirror (a fact that is very evident when looking at many disastrous photos from over the years). Honestly, I would wash my face, brush my teeth and hair, and call it a day. No makeup, no hair products, no extended efforts. And that's fine, because it never occurred to me to want to do anything else. But as I noticed myself aging in small ways for the first time, I started to understand that I could be a more active participant in the continuous development of my outer self. I can devote time and energy to changing my body.

That sounds so elementary, but I've always been much more focused on my mind so it was a new idea to me. I'd rather spend time reading a book than painting my fingernails. But then the knowledge is invisible in my head and my fingernails are odd lengths. This resolution continued my development of what I thought was important to change about my outer self to improve my self image. It sounds weird because controlling your eye color internally isn't something that most people focus on, but it kept me on a self-awareness track that I needed to strengthen from the previous year.

2010: Drink More

Photo by  nImAdestiny

 What an awesome goal! I might be the one person on the planet who vowed to drink more, not less, in the coming year. Again, this has ties to the direction I wanted to set for my life for this year, namely to go out more and to be more social instead of getting bogged down with work and life. I drink when I'm with my friends, when I'm at parties, when I'm traveling, when I go out and enjoy myself instead of staying home to read (see how the pendulum has swung?). This resolution made me get off my butt and call people I don't see all the time instead of just thinking about how nice it would be if we got together. And that is exactly what I needed this year!

So, now that you think I'm completely insane...any suggestions for my 2011 whimsical life goal? Are you thinking about yours yet? Let me know!

Photo by Leo Reynolds

*Please do not laugh at this sentence after you read my past resolutions! They might be funny and off the wall, but I do take them seriously and attempt to find things that not only highlight a sense of whimsy but also connect to bigger issues of self-image and life-adjustment.

How to Get Someone to Respect Your Resume

 

I saw this blurb on GMA this morning and it reminded me that I had written the following set of basic tips for improving your chances in the job hunt...and never posted it. So here you go!

In today's economy, millions of people are still looking for jobs. They comb the Internet, the read the paper, they ask friends, and they say novenas. I should know, I did all of those things myself. But now that I am employed and working in Human Resources, I have accrued some tips for people taking the middle step to finding a job - actually applying for one. You would not believe the things that come across my desk and filter through my inbox. Here are a few red flags to avoid if you're on the job hunt. I hope that by reviewing your resume, cover letter and application habits, you might find the thing that has been preventing you from being chosen and break through your job slump!

Photo by SOCIALisBETTER

1. If you don't write a cover letter (which you should, see below), please at least INCLUDE your actual name in the application
If I can't open your electronic resume, HOTBOD3769, and I don't know your birth name, I will most likely just delete your email rather than wasting time tracking you down.

If I get a fax that is blurry, missing some pages, or doesn't specify which position you're applying for and the only contact info I have for you is whatever fax number you sent your inadequate resume from, I will not risk having someone else (say, your current boss who didn't know you used company property in your effort to escape him) receive a return fax with my requests for clarification.

When faxing, I would advise clearly writing your name and phone number on the top of each page.When emailing, please use a non-profane email address and type your real name in the body of the email.

2. Don't lose the job before I even read your resume
Some problems leave a bad first impression that might never be surmounted. They include, but are not limited to:
-Not including your real name
-Forgetting to attach your resume and not catching your own mistake (If you catch it and resend, it can be forgiven. I get distracted too.)
-Attaching your resume in an obscure or unreadable format
-Not specifying the job you are applying for. It might seem obvious to you, but many HR Specialists are responsible for the hiring needs of an entire company and they aren't always well-informed enough about the differences in the requirements to tease your interest out of your application, especially if the available jobs are similar. 
-Writing your resume in paragraph form and explaining every life choice you've ever made - that kind of nonsense is for the interview, if you make it that far
-NOT USING SPELL CHECK

Photo by SOCIALisBETTER

3. Don't pad your resume
I'd be more impressed with someone who lacks my precise requirements but wrote a great cover letter detailing their life experiences related to a job that someone who 'enhances' their resume with nonsense or inflated job duties. We do check references, people. I've actually read a resume which listed writing on a personal Facebook as her job for the past two years. Say what? Not even a personal blog, just a Facebook account. Personally, I was unemployed for a long time before I got this job, but I just admitted it openly in my interview and explained the (good) reasons for it honestly. I could have made something up to fill the slot on my resume, but then I wouldn't be considered an honest applicant. It's better to admit a bad truth than to make up a good lie when job hunting.

4. Cover letters - do one! (And make sure it is relevant and specific.)
The cover letter is a delicate monster. You don't want to get too involved (the fact that your 'baby' is in high school and your 'princess' is engaged has no bearing on your fit for this position), but you don't want to come across as vague, demanding or standoffish either. Here are some real-life examples that made me know  that the applicant was not what we were looking for immediately.

PS Before you say I'm older than you may want, please know that I have raised five daughters and am still paying college loans for the next bazillion years (lucky me) So I will be working forever. 

This post script came at the end of a very well written cover letter, from a candidate with a lot of experience in the field. He looked good on paper, but his p.s. ruined that image. I think I know what he was trying to do here; he wanted to humanize his application and give me something to remember him by that might elicit a laugh. But instead, it just highlighted what he thought of as a personal failing (his age) and ended his list of accomplishments on a sad sour note. In my head, I read that as '::sigh:: I will be working FOR-EVER ::groan::'

If he had waited to slip that comment in at the end of his face-to-face interview, I probably would have laughed and remembered him in a favorable light. Because I had the time to sit here and think about it, the implications that came up in my mind were not of a loving, funny, beleaguered father, but of someone who was not eager to join my company as a vibrant new member of the team. My final impression, right or wrong, was of someone who is just looking for a paycheck and doesn't quite care where he has to work to get it.

I possess solid interpersonal, communication and teamwork ability, and can effectively supervise all aspects of a daily operation in government or the private sector. The non-profit boards that I currently sit on and have been affiliated with have always made fund raising a top priority. As A Substitute teacher over the years, my students have  taught me my single most important lesson, BE A GOOD LISTENER.

This letter was obviously not tailored to my organization, which was seeking a case manager for a medical office. My first impression from his government comment - and his long list of impressive local politicians as references - was that he would not well suited to dealing with sick people and their problems. Maybe that's unfair, but I'm trying to give you a truthful look at the way these things can be interpreted.

Another reason that I would not be interested in this candidate is his fund raising comment. So what? We don't need fund raising, and it was not in the job description in the ad he was responding to with this letter. Know your audience. It's great that this man knows a lot of high profile people, but it doesn't matter to us. I'm glad he knows how to fund raise - but it doesn't fit with my needs. I would have preferred a concrete example of his 'teamwork ability.'

Finally, the last sentence was a mess and totally unrelated to the rest of his rambling, disjointed paragraph. Most people today consider all caps to be 'shouting' and it is not a good way to emphasize your point. Also, the fact that this was a generic letter shows that he was, in fact, not a good listener to the qualifications and other details in our advertisement. 

I'm looking for a good job, I can keep a long time. 

Oh, the spelling, punctuation, and grammar errors I have seen. My first thought when I read that sentence was 'So can a freezer waffle.' If you want someone to take you seriously, and I cannot stress this enough, reread before you send! Spell check is our friend, people. I type quickly and often interpose letters, but no one would know that because I always check my work both as I go and before publishing it. It is the professional thing to do, and can catch so many embarrassing mistakes that present you in a bad light without really having anything to do with whether or not you could do a good job. To err is human, to present yourself properly is professional. One or two mistakes can be forgiven, but a messy application is not a good way to introduce yourself. You wouldn't go to an interview wearing stained and wrinkled clothes, would you?

to whm it may concern; contact me imediattly so i know you receved My Resume

Same problem, different configuration. You're applying for a job, not texting someone. I don't care if you have sent me your application on your phone, you should still use capitals and for the love of job hunting, be polite about it! Misspellings, random capitalization, and lack of a proper cover letter are all bad enough, but when you appear demanding right off the bat, your resume automatically goes to the bottom of the pile. How much more effort would it take to type 'please'?

Also, the above was the entire email. No name attached, with a resume entitled 'Resume' that would not open properly. Red flags, red flags, red flags! This person is not ready for the responsibility the job requires, and if I'm good at my job then I know that already and won't have to pay them unemployment when I fire them in three weeks.

If you are looking for an exact career/field match; my query for you, "How can I be given a fair chance when I am not an exact match 1 on 1? This should not be held against me not knowing my personality or abilities! I can tell you, I would and will be an excellent choice for this position

Why should I believe this? I'm all for reaching for a job that is a little above your experience, but you just told me you are not a match! YOU told me!

My salary expectations are negotiable and I would be willing to work at any salary that you are willing to offer me.

Don't do this. It's a rabbit hole that your entire job application will fall down and it will only end up one of two ways. Either the hiring manager will think 'Oh, good, a deal!' and think of you as discount merchandise (a first impression that might affect not only your salary, but how you're treated on the job), or they will not even consider someone whose first tactic is to proclaim themselves as cheap instead of highlighting their accomplishments.


This goes back to the first example, and reiterates the point that there are some things you can say, phrased well, during an interview, that should not under any circumstances be involved with the first impression that is your resume. When you write your cover letter, either have someone else read it and interpret it or try to step out of your own intentions and see if something you wanted to be a plus could be seen as a minus in another light. See if you wrote something jokingly that might come across as serious, desperate, or weird. When a stranger looks at a piece of paper or an email and superimposes their own agenda, personality and checklist over it, you don't want them to write you off for something that needs to be explained or could be misinterpreted.

I would like to be come radiology technology. I think that being radiology is the most important job in the medical filed, x-ray can find any kind of problem that patient might have it will find it.

We were not advertising for a radiologist.

Photo by Keith Williamson

5. Don't ask for more information without sending your resume - in fact, don't ask at all.
I have things to do. I'm not going to sum up the entire position for everyone who asks through emails. That's what the help wanted ad, and later the interview, are designed to do.

If you think you might be interested in a job, send in an application. If they contact you, ask more about the position. You don't have to take a job if you're not really interested, but if you make a good impression you have a new contact to add to your list. 

6. Be technologically polite
When sending your resume, attach it as a word file, but also copy/paste the entire text (including your cover letter) into the email in case the file won't open. Some people are nervous about opening files from strangers, and some people don't have the capability to open your old Wordpad file on their new computers. Also, if you're faxing your application, use a cover page and specify which job you are applying for on top. If you know the name of the HR professional or hiring manager, write it in large letters. If not, write Human Resources or Hiring Manager across the top.

Bottom line: Unfortunately, HR people see hundreds of resumes that could all be a good fit. Things get weeded out for reasons that some HR professionals won't admit; aggressiveness, sloppiness, weird fonts, personal details, corrupt attachments. Try to be clear, concise, professional, and brief in your application. Don't edit your entire personality out of your cover letter, but remember that the phrase is 'getting your foot in the door', not 'getting your entire torso, including your bad hip and unusually hairy legs, in the door.' Highlight your accomplishments, but leave some professional details to brag about in the interview. Good luck!